A friend of mine, T., moved to Pauma Valley last month. I haven’t seen him in person in over a year. Yesterday, late afternoon he posted on FB saying he was feeling social and extended an invite for those who could to join him at his place for a camp fire and some drinks. Pauma Valley is about an hour from the city of San Diego. I don’t have a car but I messaged him and said I’d like to come out. He said he’d drive to get me but since it’s such a long drive could I just spend the nights and he’d drive me back in the morning. He had an appointment scheduled at 11 about 4 minutes from my place. I had a test the next day (today now). My first of three tests for my Astronomy class. I had decided to skip my Personal Growth class in favor of studying for Astronomy. I hadn’t been feeling well all day but I wanted to get out of the house, so I rode the bus to campus. Right when I arrived on campus is when T. called and asked was a serious about coming and if so, he’d give me a ride. So..like I said, it’s an hour drive. I decided to study during that hour. When I study, I usually only study 45 minutes to 1 hour anyways. So I get my study on. I feel pretty good about it. If I had to take the test then (last night) I would have got about a 90%. So, he gets to campus. His dog Mocha is in the car. She’s a beautiful dog!
T. needs to go the bathroom so I take him to the one I most use. It’s on the 2nd floor where most of the teachers who teach humanities and languages have their offices. It’s quiet. Clean. And most importantly, away from most students. I can pee and not have to worry about it. Sometimes I walk 5-10 minutes across campus just to go this bathroom. I wish we had gender neutral bathrooms on campus.
Any old way, after that’s done and we finally figure out how to get on the freeway, we’re on our way to his place, just chatting and catching up. We get off the freeway and he pulls off to the side somewhere and says he thought he felt the car wobble. He gets out and takes a look. Apparently he’s been driving on an old spare. Everything looks okay so we take off. About 2 minutes later when we’re leaving Escondido, right about to head into Valley Center we both feel “wobble, wobble, wobble” and then hear “pop” and metal scraping and he pulls over to the side. Long story short, we get AAA to tow us to a tire place and leave the car overnight. His mom comes to pick us up to take us to T.’s place, which is like 20 more minutes. Her husband is apparently not a cool guy because he gave her a hard time about coming to pick us up. He doesn’t like T. Not before transition and certainly not after. Boo on him! During the AAA towing thing I’m thinking, ok. I have a test tomorrow. How am I going to get back to school? I get in touch with a friend, J., who says he’ll pick me up in the morning and drive me back to the city. J. is a very good friend. By the time we get to T.’s place it’s almost 11p.
The thing is, he lives on a campground. His place is small and cozy and T.’s a perfect host. His mom was talking about how beautiful the place was in the daytime. I told her I was looking forward to waking up. I thanked her for the ride and she left. Then T and I ate, had the TV on in the background, drank a mixed drink, and a couple beers (I had my first ever Guinness!! Woot!), listened to music, talked and chilled. Til like 4 in the morning! Other stuff was involved but..yeh..not going to say it here. Sorry, I’m such a tease 🙂 Use your imagination! No..no..not so dirty. Think more natural, healing qualities, mello mood/atmosphere.
We went for a walk and I took lots of pictures. My friend J., true to his word, picked me up and dropped T. off at the tire store and got me to school about 23 minutes before my test. Considering the lack of sleep and the amount of intoxicants I have in my system I think I did fairly well. I missed 4 (out of 60) for sure and maybe 3 more. So I’ll get a low A or a high B. Not too bad. We have two more tests and the lowest test is not thrown out but will count less, like 15% less than the others. I don’t know. My teacher has a weird grading system. I think this will be my lowest test. The tests aren’t accumulative and now I know how they’ll be. Pretty darn easy. If you review the study guide and don’t get wasted the night before! ha ha.
This week, I’ve had two days where I woke up in the morning and ended up somewhere in the night that I had no idea I’d be at when I started the day. It’s pretty interesting. Yesterday, in the early afternoon, I was wandering around my neighborhood and ran into two people (separate instances) that I hadn’t seen in a few months. One of them, R., and I went to get a tea at a local coffee shop. It was called White Dragon and we talked and passed the cup back and forth between us. Good to talk and catch up and I really liked the casual intimacy in sharing a cup of tea. I walked him back to work and leftfeeling better than I had all day.
I feel more free but with that freedom a bit of anxiety. It’s like, I’m well aware of the choices I’m making and how being with different people is opening up my life in ways that wouldn’t otherwise happen.
Life is a series of choices. A series of moments. Measured how?
In love and experimentation.
And people are gifts. And can make life sweeter or not as sweet. I am currently reframing my boundaries. Exploring things I’ve suppressed. Spending my quality time with quality folk who are Trans or Genderqueer for the most part. Just getting to the center of who I am and being able to talk with and be with people who just get it, is nice. I’m most definitely doing the whole pleasure seeking thing but I’m with good people in safe environments.
Happy Friday Everyone!