I feel a little down. Low in the feel good hormones. My Aunt and Uncle just left for the airport. They’ll be gone for a week. I’m leaving Monday morning for San Diego and I’ll be there for 4 or 5 days. I think I’m feeling down for many reasons. The days are going by really fast here. I miss my gf terribly. We talk on the phone and text but it’s not the same. I miss seeing her face and all the hugs, kisses, cuddles, and love we make. After the 3rd day here I thought it was too long for us to be apart and now that it’s been a week I know for sure a week is about as much as I can deal with. I also haven’t taken my shot. I need to do my shot tomorrow. I feel like I haven’t really had the privacy to do it but I should be able to do it tomorrow. If not, I’ll ask my gf to do it when I see her on Monday.
I realized yesterday that I haven’t been doing my gratitude journal. I used to do it faithfully everyday. 5 things. I haven’t consistently done it in a long time. I think that also has an affect on my mood. I didn’t sleep last night either. Me, my cousin, and my other cousin were all awake still at 330 walking around, getting stuff from the kitchen, drying clothes and each doing our own things.
I don’t want this post to be all gloom so I’ll say something good now. Today my Aunt celebrated her 63rd better. My Uncle Joe, my Auntie Deb, my cousin and I, all went to a late lunch. We had good conversation. It was easy breezy. Before that we watched an episode of 24. We are at the almost end of Season 5. I’m glad that I got to spend some of today with my Aunt. She means a lot to me and I hope she lives a long long healthy life.
My cousin’s gf is supposed to come over in about an hour. We are going to watch a movie probably and just relax. I’m sure my mood will improve soon. Mainly because it’s the nature of things. Change. Feelings and moods change.
Oh,that reminds me of something I read on Facebook recently:
~ Become a Lake ~
An aging master grew tired of his apprentice’s complaints. One morning, he sent him to get some salt. When the apprentice returned, the master told him to mix a handful of salt in a glass of water and then drink it.
“How does it taste?” the master asked.
“Bitter,” said the apprentice.
The master chuckled and then asked the young man to take the same handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake and once the apprentice swirled his handful of salt in the water, the old man said, “Now drink from the lake.”
As the water dripped down the young man’s chin, the master asked, “How does it taste?”
“Fresh,” remarked the apprentice.
“Do you taste the salt?” asked the master.
“No,” said the young man. At this the master sat beside this serious young man, and explained softly,
“The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains exactly the same. However, the amount of bitterness we taste depends on the container we put the pain in. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things. Stop being a glass. Become a lake.”
I’ll have to keep this in mind and in heart going forward.